Day 269

November 30, 2023

Today we buried my Grandpa, your Poppy. Your daddy was here. You weren’t. But, as was told to me, you won’t remember it, despite the fact that taking kids to funerals traumatizes them supposedly. Well, which is it? Do children not remember or do they become traumatized? Jeez. Way too many excuses were thrown out, when really, what should’ve happened is everyone should’ve just come on. Family is supposed to be there for each other. Period. Especially in times like this.

There were about 30 kids there today, by the way. So, sometimes, the bullshit I step in just really stinks. A lot of unkind things were said to a grieving man, especially last night. And, truly, it’s just unforgivable the hell your daddy was put through just because he wanted to attend his grandfather’s funeral.

Your daddy loved Grandpa and today was really hard on all of us. But, in the end, I know being there and standing up for him and honoring him would have made him proud.

My heart is broken into pieces and I don’t think I will ever be the same again. Your daddy needed you today. Please always remember that your daddy is so much like Grandpa. He may not have always come off that way, but in his heart and soul, he loved our Grandpa so very much.

I love you more than you will ever know. But, I must stop writing. I can’t stop crying.

Remember: our family, our blood, will ALWAYS be there for each other. You’re a part of that my love. Never forget that no matter what.